What connects borderlines and abusive relationships? Answer: Boundary issues.Individuals with a borderline personality disorder have significant iss
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| Abuse and Borderline Personality Disorder Borderline Personality ... |
What connects borderlines and abusive relationships? Answer: Boundary issues.
Individuals with a borderline personality disorder have significant issues with attachment. They cling to others...attaching themselves strongly, and then become intensely angry or hostile when they believe they are being wronged. They may believe they are being ignored or mistreated by those they depend on and attach to, and this justifies their striking out.
In abusive relationships, individuals lose a clear sense of individual boundaries. And this "boundary blur" goes well beyond two people in a loving relationship union. Instead, it is as though the concept individual doesn't exist.
The same is so with borderlines. There is no sense of the other person having much of any sacred existence other than...as they relate to the projections, demands and service needs of the borderline.
Now you might be scratching your head as you are reading this article wondering who is the borderline in the abusive relationship. Is it the perpetrator or is it the victim? Good question...
Borderlines and Abusers
When abusers are borderlines, their violence has an irrational component different from the violence of an intermittent explosive disorder or a sociopath. The violence may appear to spring from a more psychotic process.
As described above, their rage can be ignited by a belief that they are being mistreated or ignored that is simply not based in reality. They harbor a "story" that the person they cling to is there to fulfill their every need, irrespective of the common and customary boundaries of other human beings.
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Source : http://imentalhealth.net/mental-health-disorders/personality-disorders/borderline-personality-disorder-abuse-what-connects-borderlines-and-domestic-abuse
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Commonly question about Borderline Personality Disorder Abuse - What Connects Borderlines and Domestic Abuse?
Question :
Borderline Personality Disorder causing emotional abuse>?
I have been reading up on boarderline personality disorder, and im convinced that my boyfriend has it. Weve been together 8 months and im sure all the signs are there. It causes him to be controlling and emotionally abusive, altho i LOVE HIM. i love the real him. the him that i see thru it all, the him that is in his soul not what has become as a result of the physical and emotinal abuse he received as a child. I know this is the cause--hes told me horrific stories and the abuse continues in his household (hes 20) Anyways, i love him so much but me being 19 i can even think of marrying him, but then sometimes this monster comes out and that man i couldnt marry. Should i stay with him and see if i can help him or should i get out before its too late?Answer :
Domestic Violence has many levels to it. It goes from mild insults to abusive bullying to physical violence to murder.
Verbal abuse is as much of a crime as physical abuse. In my state, Washington State, Domestic Violence is a crime.
Punishable by Law.
No one has ever told you that you are in Domestic Violence with your boyrfriend. No one has ever told you because you are too young. I was in Domestic Violence with 3 boyfriends over the course of 17 years. No one told me that my boyfriends controlling me with emotional addicted abuse was indeed Domestic Violence.
The Violence found in a Domestic Relationship betweeen two humans is the biggest taboo subject to this day.
Your boyfriend is controlling because he is incapable of controlling the demons in his brain. His demons have vicious tongues that keeps zaping you deep
No one told me I had ALL the symptoms of
Domestic Violence. Forget about your boyfirend diagnosed as boarderline personality disorder, how about your disorder of seeking love in a man who is obsessed with hatred disguised behaviors hiding behind many mask of verbal cruelty.
Cruelty with words is used to manipulate a partner. Because I had no clue for 17 years, as a slave to those men, by the time I reached the third boyfriend, then I was in Domestic Extreme Verbal Abuse for 8 years. Can you tolerate your boyfriend for 8 years.
There are some very nice guys out there that will treat you as a princess with kindness, instead of cruel words.
You are only 19, you have no clue what true love is.
There is no cruelty in true love. Cruelty only exist with conditional love.
Conditional love is the manipulator and the betrayer.
It takes 26 years for a human brain to be completely formed. Your brain is the last part of your body that reach maturity as body mass at 26. That is how complex your brain is. You have 7 years to go, until you are 26 when your brain is ready to coast for the rest of your life.
Anger, hatred, cruelty were imposed to children who still do not have the capacity to operate normally in their twenties or thirties. I had to reach my forties to liberate myself from the atrocity of daily verbal abuse and the hell of Domestic Violence.
If you do not end your relationship, your next one will be worst. If you do not end the next relationship, the third one will be hell.
Compounded factor of lack of self love. If you cannot face the truth, the next time around, it will 100 amplified. The third time around is amplified 1000 times.
My heart attack saved me from Domestic Violence. Today, only nice people are in my life and my boyfriend treats me like a princess. He is the first boyfriend in my life who treats me with absolute respect. We met 2 years ago and I am 44.
Can you see yourself for the next 20 years, being in a relationship with one or many men over the course of the years and for 20 years, you are engaged in verbal abuse on a daily basis.
Can your precious brain tolerate such atrocity for that long.
It is your choice, to be treated like a princess or a slave. Choose your man well. Find a future husband who is smart and passionate with you.
Why linger longer with a boyfriend who treats you with absolute disrespect. You pretend to love the true him while he rapes your brain with his viscious words.
Beware Princess of 19 years, the emotional addiction of verbal abuse needs two willing participant, to dance the tango of a hellish reality laced with the viruses of the brain out of conrol.
To be a tyrant can only be if you are already a victim. To bullie another is to be a tyrant who is like a vampire to a victim sucking for an emotional high.
When you understand the anatomy of the human body, you understand that to engage in an emotional hit is to release a natural chemical in the blood stream of your nervous system called stereoids.
Domestic Violence is an emotional addiction.
Caroline Couture Taylor
Seatte, Washington
Domestic Violence has many levels to it. It goes from mild insults to abusive bullying to physical violence to murder.
Verbal abuse is as much of a crime as physical abuse. In my state, Washington State, Domestic Violence is a crime.
Punishable by Law.
No one has ever told you that you are in Domestic Violence with your boyrfriend. No one has ever told you because you are too young. I was in Domestic Violence with 3 boyfriends over the course of 17 years. No one told me that my boyfriends controlling me with emotional addicted abuse was indeed Domestic Violence.
The Violence found in a Domestic Relationship betweeen two humans is the biggest taboo subject to this day.
Your boyfriend is controlling because he is incapable of controlling the demons in his brain. His demons have vicious tongues that keeps zaping you deep
No one told me I had ALL the symptoms of
Domestic Violence. Forget about your boyfirend diagnosed as boarderline personality disorder, how about your disorder of seeking love in a man who is obsessed with hatred disguised behaviors hiding behind many mask of verbal cruelty.
Cruelty with words is used to manipulate a partner. Because I had no clue for 17 years, as a slave to those men, by the time I reached the third boyfriend, then I was in Domestic Extreme Verbal Abuse for 8 years. Can you tolerate your boyfriend for 8 years.
There are some very nice guys out there that will treat you as a princess with kindness, instead of cruel words.
You are only 19, you have no clue what true love is.
There is no cruelty in true love. Cruelty only exist with conditional love.
Conditional love is the manipulator and the betrayer.
It takes 26 years for a human brain to be completely formed. Your brain is the last part of your body that reach maturity as body mass at 26. That is how complex your brain is. You have 7 years to go, until you are 26 when your brain is ready to coast for the rest of your life.
Anger, hatred, cruelty were imposed to children who still do not have the capacity to operate normally in their twenties or thirties. I had to reach my forties to liberate myself from the atrocity of daily verbal abuse and the hell of Domestic Violence.
If you do not end your relationship, your next one will be worst. If you do not end the next relationship, the third one will be hell.
Compounded factor of lack of self love. If you cannot face the truth, the next time around, it will 100 amplified. The third time around is amplified 1000 times.
My heart attack saved me from Domestic Violence. Today, only nice people are in my life and my boyfriend treats me like a princess. He is the first boyfriend in my life who treats me with absolute respect. We met 2 years ago and I am 44.
Can you see yourself for the next 20 years, being in a relationship with one or many men over the course of the years and for 20 years, you are engaged in verbal abuse on a daily basis.
Can your precious brain tolerate such atrocity for that long.
It is your choice, to be treated like a princess or a slave. Choose your man well. Find a future husband who is smart and passionate with you.
Why linger longer with a boyfriend who treats you with absolute disrespect. You pretend to love the true him while he rapes your brain with his viscious words.
Beware Princess of 19 years, the emotional addiction of verbal abuse needs two willing participant, to dance the tango of a hellish reality laced with the viruses of the brain out of conrol.
To be a tyrant can only be if you are already a victim. To bullie another is to be a tyrant who is like a vampire to a victim sucking for an emotional high.
When you understand the anatomy of the human body, you understand that to engage in an emotional hit is to release a natural chemical in the blood stream of your nervous system called stereoids.
Domestic Violence is an emotional addiction.
Caroline Couture Taylor
Seatte, Washington
Question :
Substance abuse and borderline personality disorder? Please help?
I have BPD and I have substance abuse issues. Im not an alcoholic or drug addict. Yet. But its getting worse. I spend most of my time feeling empty. Thats when I drink. It either makes me really happy or really depressed. But at least its a feeling, not numb-ness. When Im depressed I smoke weed. I dont want to do these things. I just want to be happy. I tell my shrinks but they just nod and ask me questions. No advice or anything. I ve tried doing some other things I enjoy but it doesnt work. Help. What can I do. I dont want to be an alcoholic or a drug addict.Answer :
i think your looking in the wrong place. i think doctors really watch the clock and know when 3 min is up. i only ever fit in with drug addicts and now i know thats what kept me down. i found a church group and i found i can be happy without drugs. you need to think about what kind of stuff you really like(animals etc) and join a group where every one is equal and not in a click.you will make new friends and find a whole new world
i think your looking in the wrong place. i think doctors really watch the clock and know when 3 min is up. i only ever fit in with drug addicts and now i know thats what kept me down. i found a church group and i found i can be happy without drugs. you need to think about what kind of stuff you really like(animals etc) and join a group where every one is equal and not in a click.you will make new friends and find a whole new world
Question :
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_
Online abuse of others and borderline personality disorder - is there a direct correlation?
I ve been attacked pretty viciously and abused online on the nola.com neighborhood forums for years, 52 months by one particular person. Some, make that at least a half-dozen, seem to purposely try to pick fights with me, or insult me, post my addresses and phone numbers (former phone numbers), or say that I don t know what I am talking about, ESPECIALLY when I use Google Map satellite images to back up what I am saying. Is this a common defensive reaction when some one obviously DOES understand what they are talking about? 75% of women and 25% of men have BPD at some time in their lives?http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_
Answer :
There has been no proven correlation between online abuse and BPD, and none of what you have described in your post has anything with any relevance to BPD.
BPD is a complex diagnosis and has no definitive "cause". There are commonalities like sexual trauma, childhood abuse, specific neurological or biochemical irregularities and genetic predisposition, but there is nothing that can take the cake. i MUST correct something you said, which was that "75% of women and 25% of men have BPD at some time in their lives." this is absolutely incorrect. Only approximately 2-3% of the ENTIRE population will qualify for the diagnosis of BPD. A statement that 3/4 of women have this disorder is completely wrong, misleading and injudicious. It is also a difficult diagnosis, inasmuch as the symptoms are likely to appear in many people, but not in the patterned, prolonged, life affecting, and intense ways that are required to make a correct diagnosis (ie. not everyone who has some of the symptoms has BPD)
i am not sure if you are asking if you might have BPD due to them abusing you, or if they might have BPD and in such are being caused to abuse you. Can you elaborate? trying to diagnose yourself or people you associate with based on simple traits and the access to ask.com is not only inacurrate, but is potentially harmful. I would love to lend any knowledge i can.
i also recommend that you read the article that you have referenced above. If you have already, i would recommend rereading it, as it does appear that you have missed many of the extremely important facts and ideas about this already misunderstood condition.
and unrelated to BPD you dont have to get so worked up and thinking yourself into a personality disorder--- if these people are abusing you, then stop exposing yourself to them. i really really hope that none of what i have said comes off as rude, i just am a very literal person.
allpsych.com
and the fact that i actually have bpd
There has been no proven correlation between online abuse and BPD, and none of what you have described in your post has anything with any relevance to BPD.
BPD is a complex diagnosis and has no definitive "cause". There are commonalities like sexual trauma, childhood abuse, specific neurological or biochemical irregularities and genetic predisposition, but there is nothing that can take the cake. i MUST correct something you said, which was that "75% of women and 25% of men have BPD at some time in their lives." this is absolutely incorrect. Only approximately 2-3% of the ENTIRE population will qualify for the diagnosis of BPD. A statement that 3/4 of women have this disorder is completely wrong, misleading and injudicious. It is also a difficult diagnosis, inasmuch as the symptoms are likely to appear in many people, but not in the patterned, prolonged, life affecting, and intense ways that are required to make a correct diagnosis (ie. not everyone who has some of the symptoms has BPD)
i am not sure if you are asking if you might have BPD due to them abusing you, or if they might have BPD and in such are being caused to abuse you. Can you elaborate? trying to diagnose yourself or people you associate with based on simple traits and the access to ask.com is not only inacurrate, but is potentially harmful. I would love to lend any knowledge i can.
i also recommend that you read the article that you have referenced above. If you have already, i would recommend rereading it, as it does appear that you have missed many of the extremely important facts and ideas about this already misunderstood condition.
and unrelated to BPD you dont have to get so worked up and thinking yourself into a personality disorder--- if these people are abusing you, then stop exposing yourself to them. i really really hope that none of what i have said comes off as rude, i just am a very literal person.
Source(s):
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder,allpsych.com
and the fact that i actually have bpd
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